In Pulling Back the Shades: Erotica, Intimacy, and The Longings Of A Woman’s Heart, Christian authors Dannah Gresh and Dr. Juli Slattery argue that all women desire five basic things from men:
- To be cherished by a man
- To be protected by a strong man
- To rescue a man
- To be sexually alive, and
- To escape reality.
Couples Nursing offers all five.
1. Cherished by a man. Refer back to this video and notice how loved an actress said she felt when her husband helped suck out her breast milk while engorged. Of course, a woman who values attention being paid to her breasts daily would feel immensely loved by this act.
2. Protected by a strong man. Granted, the picture that often comes to mind is of the manly man offering physical protection, but emotional strength in a man, especially one who uses choice words to protect his wife from fears and worries, is equally laudable. All ANR men I’ve encountered possess this quiet, mature, deep, gentle, spiritual strength, not the aggressive macho kind. Mutual protection is in view here. The protection he offers her is more subtle, and is more of the emotional/psychological variety. He grants protection from self-doubt and insecurities: “[…] I can’t even begin to imagine the intimacy felt in those moments and how I would feel more feminine, and more like a woman in a purely Biblical sense. By nature, I am a nurturing woman and I think being in an ANR would increase those feelings in me and provide almost a sense of healing for my own personal insecurities,” said one single-ready-to-mingle woman.
3. Rescue a man. By far one of the strongest reasons women give for wanting an ANR. In their own words, they want: “a man who comes home from a long day of work filled with stress and the worries and frustrations of the day and seeks my full, milky breasts to relax and unwind. A man who lays beside me at night and lets my dripping nipples drift him off to sleep.” Another woman: “[…] to see and feel your relaxation and pure pleasure as you suckle.” Also consider: “I want to have a relaxing, cozy home for my husband to come home to; his safe-haven from the day to day grind.” And “I want to serve you Let me be the beautiful caring, nurturing woman that I am. Id love to take care of all your needs.”
“My love will change him.” Nearly every woman, regardless of ANR interests, has told herself this. Because deep down in every woman is a drive to save a man from his masculine wildness.
4. Be sexually alive. See Sounds erotic: prospective Mrs. Christ-centered ANR’s godly sexual honesty and Surprise finding in response to nipple stimulation for proof that women find ANR highly sensual and seismically explosive.
5. Escape reality. We ANR folks are on the cutting edge of intimacy and are sexual pioneers (or depending on how you see it, we’re resurrecting a long dead sexual custom). One woman on an ANR dating site referred to all other sex acts as “vanilla.” Another put it this way: “I firmly believe that ANR/ABF is the closest that to humans can be.
Unlike some, I don’t believe that ANR/ABF is a fetish or a “tool” to reach an end goal.
I believe that it is a choice.. a way of being.
for partners to grow and build an ever stronger, closer bond WITH each other. It’s truly an incredible experience and everyone has their own unique feelings about it. For me, breast feeding is not just erotic. It’s a healthy physical, as well as emotional experience for both. [It] is so incredibly fulfilling … You relax and open yourself to the wonderful experience … You know he is feeding on part of you and it creates an intense pleasure and deep inner connection. Deeply intimate. It’s a connection that can’t be expressed well with words, but it makes you feel vibrant and fulfilled. You feel warm and glowing all over. Just like when clean clothes are freshly removed from the dryer and you wear them or hold them close. An indescribable warmth and feeling of peaceful relaxation. You feel so soothed and serene it’s almost as if you’re weightless, gently floating in time and space … you wish this blissful moment could last forever. You know it can’t, but the future holds many more, so you surrender to the moment and gently drift off into a serene heavenly sleep. Think about the excitement when you start to produce milk. Your breasts will become healthier, larger, fuller, and more beautiful. You feel a pervasive warm glow from your breasts. They make you feel so good, you ache to [use them]. You yearn to have … your soothing rich essence drawn out from [you] into [him]. Watching him feed from you makes you feel incredible. The feeling can be so intense it can be indescribable. You feel a connection deep down to the core of your being, a connection that is so beautiful and natural.” Others said “… As your warm love releases into him, the sweetness of the taste, the flow of the spray, and the nutrition of milk are almost certain to send him into bliss. You will both begin to throb together and it will leave you both wanting more. This is my promise. […] you need to give in to more intimate time together to open up to receiving the bliss nature intended for you to have in your life. I believe this is the ultimate form of love making when you can be so in tune with one another for mutual sharing you reach levels of love that are truly blessings. Enjoy and bliss on!” “Its almost Springtime. Nothing is more intimate than taking a walk in the Springtime woods with your lover. After rounding many bends, we come to a secluded opening just off the main path. Vines surround us, the thin early grass is soft and inviting. You spread out the blanket and help me to a seated position … you join me on the blanket … Looking deep into your eyes … I surrender to you we fulfill each other’s needs for almost an hour, there in the tender Springtime sun.”
Christ-centered ANR 