The following paragraph is a paraphrase of an excerpt of a message I sent a believer centered upon a topic on which we have a fundamental disagreement. It resonates with me on the topic of ANR as well.
You have an unbiblical idea of happiness; you advised me to forgive and move on because you also know what it’s like to face severe adversity, but have moved on long ago. But to be sad is natural. Even God himself laments and weeps (Genesis 6:6, John 11:35). In truth, there is a clear connection between sorrow and love/repentance in the Bible (see Romans 9:2-3). When necessary, humble, servant-hearted lamenting and sorrow actually makes us happier. It improves our piety and love for others. Very harmful behavior includes trying to act tough while suppressing issues or wearing a fake smile.
“The Christian life is sorrowful. Joyful, but also sorrowful.”
— John Piper
Something as humble, and at first glance, childish, like adult breastfeeding, actually makes us happier in marriage. Nursing makes a couple much happier.
See also: The God who mourns
Christ-centered ANR 