Disclaimer: this post isn’t necessarily an endorsement of everything on Bountiful Fruits. Although Married Milkmaid and I are both professing Christians and ANR advocates, our blogs aren’t exactly identical in mission. I do, however, support her efforts to normalize this beautiful lifestyle.
As I sit down to write this post, I am truly a woman at peace. The house is very still, as it always is during the early hours of morning, but it no longer feels as if the silence is deafening and oppressing; it is a contented sort of peaceful quiet that I can truly enjoy once more because all is well and it feels as if my world is complete once more.
S came home to me last night.
It seemed as if he had been gone forever, and by the time I heard his car pull into our driveway around 10:50 p.m., I was as lighthearted and excited as I’d been on our very first date 16 years ago, because, you see, I had something very important to share with him.
As difficult as the long week was, I think the final three hours leading to his imminent arrival were far worse; he was so very close, but still quite far. I did a lot of pacing and clock-watching during those last 180 minutes, and every time my phone chimed, alerting me that he had texted an arrival time update, my heart soared.
Are you there, baby? I’m two hours out. Love you!
Missing you like crazy. I’m about an hour from home.
Less than 30 minutes now. I can’t wait to nurse. Love you.
Neither of us are strangers to homecomings, and I wanted this one to be just as special and meaningful as the ones we’ve shared in the past. I had prepared myself as meticulously as I had on that first evening so long ago, and made our nursing space warm and inviting with lit candles and lamplight.
And I had placed the small wine-colored velvet pillow, what we call S’ nursing pillow, in its proper place, among my reclining pillows, on our bed.
Just before 11:00, headlights washed through the window, and I heard the familiar purring of his car as it came to a smooth stop in front of our home. The engine stopped. Everything went dark. And my heart began to race.
I never thought he would make it inside!
He didn’t need his key last night because I was waiting at the door to let him in.
He was beautiful!
There were several long moments of exchanging tight embraces and long kisses and sweet endearments, and he did what he has done for many years, the one thing that makes me feel beautiful and adored and treasured.
He took my face in his hands and looked into my eyes, as if memorizing what he saw in them.
“I missed this face,” he said. “I missed you.”
“I missed you, too,” I replied. “More than anything. I’m so glad you’re home.”
From there, things grew a bit flirtatious; I asked him how he liked my new blouse, and I took him by the hand, and said, “Come with me. I want to show you something.”
He was more than willing to follow me to the bedroom.
My body blossomed in S’ absence, and I wanted to share the complete transformation with him, so we began our beautiful nursing session by looking at the photos I had taken throughout the week, and as I stroked his hair and he rubbed my back, I asked him to describe the changes he noticed, and each time he did, I reminded him that I was doing this for him.
Always and only for him.
I took his hands, those strong, work-roughened hands that handle my flesh with such gentle reverence, and led them to my breasts so he could explore that clothed swell, gauging their firmness, their fullness, with his fingertips before cupping them and supporting the weight of them in his palms. I covered his hands with mine, and felt the trembling flex of his fingers as they plied and pressed against my bosom.
We were both flushed. Our hearts were pounding in time, and when S was finally able to find his voice, his words were soft, hushed.
“They’re so heavy.”
“They’re full,” I replied. “They’re full of the milk I made for you. And now they need to be emptied so you can be filled.”
Our bed was waiting, warm and inviting, and he came to me, very much like a man who had been starving, and I eagerly gave him the one thing that would sate his desire.
That first latch was amazing.
Last night I was able to feed my husband’s physical and emotional hunger from the breasts that had prepared such a feast over the course of one week.
It was glorious!
And when he had fed from each breast and had been lavished with caresses and kisses and whispered words of love throughout the entirety of our nursing session, he allowed his mouth to slip from my breast, and he thanked me for what I had given him.
But the pleasure was mine.
To be the woman who is blessed to nurture and nourish this gracious and loving man is a gift beyond compare.
He completes me.
Without S, I am only half of a person.
When he had nursed, I allowed him to drift off to sleep, and it was beautiful to lie next to him, feeling his warmth, his strong presence, and listen to the slow and steady rhythm of his breathing. A physical joining will come soon, and it will be wonderful, but last night, we shared an emotional and spiritual joining that connected our hearts and fulfilled us in a way that even lovemaking cannot.
Everyone is beginning to stir. The house will soon be as full as my heart is right now.
The children will be eager to see their father, and I will be forced to share him with three little people who have missed his presence and affection. We will take on our roles as parents once more because Dad is home, and our family is complete.
But, just as it was last night, tonight will belong only to us.
And it will be magical!
Source: Bountiful Fruits: Reunited!
“…rejoice greatly with her, …
11 For you will nurse and be satisfied
at her comforting breasts;
you will drink deeply
and delight in her overflowing abundance.”
Isaiah 66:10c, 11
“I am looking for a respectful, faithful, christian gentleman & future husband who has a deep desire for his Proverbs 31:10 wife to feed him daily with her essence… I have had a longing to nurse my husband since I was a teenager, not ever knowing that ANR’s are more common in marriages than are ever talked about. I thought I was the odd one with the deep yearning … when in all reality, it is a God-given desire in all of us; for the woman’s desire to be suckled … and for the man wanting to … drink of her nourishing essence, bringing needed relief to the inner ache and fullness at hand. Never having been married nor nursed a baby, the desire to deeply bond with my husband and give him this gift no one else can(married for life), has lept off the charts. In my research on Mother-Child breastfeeding, there are significant hormones released in this amazing process. Oxytocin is the “bonding” hormone. It is released in the breastmilk during breastfeeding so that Mother and child attach & bond. Oxytocin & dopamine are released during a couple’s love making, facilitating their bonding as well. Prolactin is the “relaxation” hormone released in both instances. In couples, it is the “relaxed feeling” in the after-glow 🙂 I have read alot of informaton & blogs from sites to know this takes real commitment & patience in this process to bring in the sweet milk. I am greatly encouraged to know that I am capable of producing milk at my age and without prior childbirth experience … I have not been in an ANR before, so the thought of this [ANR dating] community existing is very exciting and gives me hope to find the husband of my deepest desire. I love to cook & bake. I want to have a relaxing, cozy home for my husband to come home to; his safe-haven from the day to day grind. Growing together in our shared faith(not religion), coupled with our ANR can only take our already deep bond to an even deeper level that we have never experienced. If what I have written is what you are looking for, then awesome, send me your thoughts. Please no game players. I want serious-NOT curious. God be with you. Jeanne”
“The thought of providing my partner with nourishing milk is a wonderful thought. And the sight of him drinking from … me… I can’t explain the feeling it gives me. I want the closeness and bonding that naturally comes with that kind of relationship. Adult nursing relationships offer a connection conventional relationships don’t have and I want that.”
– ANR hopeful
Enjoy your Thanksgiving weekend. And to all my married nursers, make tonight’s session a special one : )
Couldn’t do the tally for this quarter. Does anyone know when ANRSpace may be back up?
See also: Godly ANR dating site desperately needed
I occasionally get concerned about the possibility of a future wife’s increased size. If she isn’t too large to begin with, the increased cup size would be obvious.
What couples do behind closed doors is none of my business and I always try to focus on women’s eyes, not their breasts, but when living with the couple that practiced CN, I couldn’t help noticing the fact that the wife was about two cup sizes bigger when compared to the wedding picture in the living room. I suspected an ANR marriage even before overhearing her disclosure. This couple made me realize that people may be able to tell what my future wife and I do behind closed doors.
I’m at a place in my life where I’m quite secure in myself, especially with regards to my identity in Christ, but the facts that ANRs are still taboo and marriage will be a novelty have me a bit concerned.
I wonder how other couples handle this and many other potentially embarrassing situations. I do know that the husband and wife founders of an ANR site successfully allayed fears that the wife may leak during business meetings, although this is a bit different from my concerns.
Maybe I ought to let go and embrace it, after all, by establishing this blog, my aim is to promote this lifestyle, regardless of people’s opinions and judgments.
A few months before starting this blog, when researching ANR traits in women, and a picture of the typical ANR woman begin to take shape in my mind, I noticed many of the ladies that stood out tended to have an exalted, blessed, spiritual and heavenly beauty about them, so my mantra was “aim for divine femininity.” I resolved to aim for a woman who’s truly nurturing, motherly, voluptuous, spiritual, affectionate, feminine, caring and beautiful.
There was something about them I couldn’t quite describe that was a lot more charis than the average woman.
Unfortunately, I’ve heard people say some non-Christians behave more Christian-like than Christians. Couples Nursing-friendly women who aren’t Christian prove this with their love and grace. Which makes a woman that’s Christian and into Couples Nursing an unbeatable combination.
Be patient. Trust God. God will see you through and you’ll most likely taste this and enjoy His grace in this exceptionally beautiful relationship.
As you serve the Lord and hold on to His promises, keep an eye out for a brother or sister that fits the ANR profile, knowing how and when to bring up the ANR issue should anything develop between you two. No point stressing and obsessing over something that’ll probably happen, if you go about it the right way.
Be patient. Trust God. Don’t be mastered by anything except the absolute supremacy of Christ in all of life.
“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”
— Matthew 6:33
“For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.”
— Psalm 84:11
“He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?”
— Romans 8:32
There’s only one thing stopping me from creating the ANR dating site for which so many of us deeply long. But it’s one major hindrance.
To operate a blog, you only need one person with free time here and there but with a website dedicated to matchmaking, I feel I’ll need to invest so much more. I believe it’ll take at least five people to moderate such a site.
Dear Lord, please raise some believers to rise to the occasion. There are several Christians who want to see this happen so let them rise and join in partnership for this great biblical, Christ-glorifying endeavor.
“People need to pursue the relationship first then the ANR. With the taboo still surrounding it I feel [a hastily created ANR dating site] may do more [harm] than [good]. Plus I would rather work on content than spending my time constantly policing people.”
– Co-blogger Raymond Stone
Be sure to see Godly ANR dating site desperately needed
Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord,
who walks in his ways!
2 You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands;
you shall be blessed, and it shall be well with you.
3 Your wife will be like a fruitful vine
within your house;
ESV Study notes:
The faithful person … has a wife who is like a fruitful vine (i.e., a bringer of joy like wine, and the mother of children; cf. Ps. 127:3)
Song of Solomon 7:
8 I say I will climb the palm tree
and lay hold of its fruit.
Oh may your breasts be like clusters of the vine,
and the scent of your breath like apples,
Note the presupposition in this line of reasoning.
The preconceived notion in this argument goes something like: breastfeeding is a special, intimate moment of bonding between mother and child. (That, it certainly is). But it further assumes that it must remain only between mother and child while it need not be confined to that dynamic.
The Bible is the final authority on all matters. Since it never states nor implies that breastfeeding is limited to a mother nourishing her child, then breastfeeding is not limited to a mother nourishing her child.
We must rely not on our feelings or fallen sense of propriety but on God’s word alone.
Some might counter by saying not all unhealthy or imprudent behaviors are specifically prohibited in the Bible, and may adduce the consumption of other bodily fluids, as a counterexample. Scripture never specifically condemns such “perversions” but that doesn’t make it okay to drink blood, for example.
My response to this counterargument lies in the uniqueness of breast milk. It is the only bodily fluid designed with the sole intent of nurturing another human being. Even some experts who find the idea of ABF repugnant admit the harmlessness of adults consuming the milk of a healthy female, therefore the mental block people have against ANRs is neither medical nor scientific, it’s psychological, and Christ has set us free from all psychological taboos.
“Childhood innocence and adult sexuality should be kept separate,” argued one woman. I agree, that’s why when I have kids, I would love them to innocently enjoy cartoons while my wife and I innocently participate in adult entertainment in a locked bedroom.
I categorically reject the notion that Couples Nursing somehow crosses the boundaries of normalcy or the ‘creepy pedophile’ line, because I firmly believe God intentionally created breastfeeding to also have a sexual component. First, multiple Bible verses affirm female breasts to be sex organs. Additionally, medical experts report that nipples are erogenous zones  and many sexually active nursing mothers report spraying milk while experiencing orgasm. One recounted how embarrassed she felt because she nearly hosed him down during sex.
We can surely state without a doubt that there’s a connection between breastfeeding and sexual pleasure, and God says in His word that breasts are secondary sex organs. All evidence considered, an unbiased person would admit that breastfeeding itself can be erotic. I’ve heard of women who felt so guilty for having an orgasm while breastfeeding their babies that they completely quit nursing. “With [my husband],” admitted one woman,” I don’t have to pretend that bfing isn’t erotic.”
All arguments that breastfeeding shouldn’t be sexualized can’t withstand biblical scrutiny. Christian ANR critics often raise objections on the basis of biblical gender roles, hierarchies, and reverence, all of which I’ve rebutted in my posts A Biblical defense of ANRs and Am I twisting Scripture to justify my kinky fetish?
Rather than violating the divine order, doing things considered taboo, foolish, childish, irreverent and too vulnerable can on the contrary be the best way to vindicate it, just like a Man who is also the God of the universe voluntarily placed Himself under a curse and let His own creatures mock and strip and murder Him in order to redeem some of lost humanity. There was a time Saul of Tarsus considered this so taboo and offensive he would have arrested or killed you if you dared preach it to him.
If we want to argue using similar logic, then we must also insist that the mouth ought not be sexualized. We sometimes kiss our children with it.
Our arms can’t be sexualized either. We hold and hug babies with them.
What about cartoons? And other animated entertainment? Those were all originally meant for children. Does that mean adults can’t and haven’t adapted them for more grown-up use? See a list of the highest rated cartoons for teens and adults here. And how about adult coloring books which CNN reports are “all the rage right now [August 2017]?”
Because something was primarily intended for childhood consumption doesn’t mean it can find no audience among the adult population, and given a spin that totally differs from the usage of its original demographic. With the hubby, it’s a totally different dynamic.
1. The newest, hottest workout recovery beverage: Human breast milk, Washington Post
2. See Proverbs 5:19: “a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts drench you at all times; be led astray always in her love.”
3. Ezekiel 23:3: “who acted like prostitutes in Egypt, behaving promiscuously in their youth. Their breasts were fondled there, and their virgin nipples caressed.”
4. Ezekiel 23:8: “She didn’t give up her promiscuity that began in Egypt, when men slept with her in her youth, caressed her virgin nipples, and poured out their lust on her.”
5. Ezekiel 23:21: “So you revisited the indecency of your youth, when the Egyptians caressed your nipples to enjoy your youthful breasts.”
6. Women’s clitoris, vagina and cervix mapped on the sensory cortex: fMRI evidence, National Center for Biotechnology Information, U.S. National Library of Medicine, National Institutes of Health
7. Female hot spots: extragenital erogenous zones, Research Gate
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.[a] 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
- Ephesians 5:27 Or holy and blameless
ESV Study Bible notes:
5:22-33 Wives and Husbands. The first example of general submission (v. 21) is illustrated as Paul exhorts wives to submit to their husbands (vv. 22-24, 33). Husbands, on the other hand, are not told to submit to their wives but to love them (vv. 25-33).
5:25 love. [Paul] does not command the husband to submit to his wife but instead tells the husband that he must give himself up for her. Thus, husbands are to love their wives in a self-sacrificial manner, following the example of Christ, who “gave himself up for” the church in loving self-sacrifice. Clearly the biblical picture of a husband laying down his life for his wife is directly opposed to any kind of male tyranny or oppression … Notably, Paul devotes three times more space to the husband’s duty (nine verses) than to the wife’s (three verses).
5:31 one flesh. The command for a husband to love his wife as he loves his own flesh (v. 29) originates in the creation reality that God joins husbands and wives together to “become one flesh.” Paul’s quotation is from Gen 2:24, speaking of marriage before there was any sin in the world; see also Matt. 19:5; Mark 10:8; 1 Cor 6:16.
5:32 By mystery Paul means the hidden plan of God that has come to fulfillment in Christ Jesus (see 1:9; 3:3-4, 9; and 6:19), thus his quotation about marriage from Genesis 2 (in Eph. 5:31) ties in to the relationship between Christ and his church. Paul’s meaning is profound: he interprets the original creation of the husband-and-wife union as itself modeled on Christ’s forthcoming union with the church as his “body” (see v. 23). Therefore, marriage from the beginning of creation (Genesis 1) was created by God to be a reflection of and pattern after Christ’s relation to the church. Thus Paul’s commands regarding the roles of husbands and wives do not merely reflect the culture of his day but present God’s ideal for all marriages at all times, as exemplified by the relationship between the bride of Christ (the church) and Christ himself, the Son of God.
Besides preaching the gospel to him and the things of God in general, the most loving thing a woman can do for a husband is to nurse him. I feel this way because it’s not something physically necessary. Sure, men feel loved when their wives give them plenty of sexual action but sexual intercourse is very necessary for both spouses, and not only for procreative reasons. But a man does not need to drink his wife’s breastmilk. This is precisely why I think husband breastfeeding is the second most loving thing a woman can do for her man.
“Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.”
Proverbs 5:19 KJV
satisfy…: Heb. water thee
be thou…: Heb. err thou always in her love
English Standard Version (ESV)
32 “Give ear, O heavens, and I will speak,
and let the earth hear the words of my mouth.
2 May my teaching drop as the rain,
my speech distill as the dew,
like gentle rain upon the tender grass,
and like showers upon the herb.
3 For I will proclaim the name of the Lord;
ascribe greatness to our God!
4 “The Rock, his work is perfect,
for all his ways are justice.
A God of faithfulness and without iniquity,
just and upright is he.
5 They have dealt corruptly with him;
they are no longer his children because they are blemished;
they are a crooked and twisted generation.
6 Do you thus repay the Lord,
you foolish and senseless people?
Is not he your father, who created you,
who made you and established you?
7 Remember the days of old;
consider the years of many generations;
ask your father, and he will show you,
your elders, and they will tell you.
8 When the Most High gave to the nations their inheritance,
when he divided mankind,
he fixed the borders[a] of the peoples
according to the number of the sons of God.[b]
9 But the Lord‘s portion is his people,
Jacob his allotted heritage.
10 “He found him in a desert land,
and in the howling waste of the wilderness;
he encircled him, he cared for him,
he kept him as the apple of his eye.
11 Like an eagle that stirs up its nest,
that flutters over its young,
spreading out its wings, catching them,
bearing them on its pinions,
12 the Lord alone guided him,
no foreign god was with him.
13 He made him ride on the high places of the land,
and he ate the produce of the field,
and he suckled him with honey out of the rock,
and oil out of the flinty rock.
14 Curds from the herd, and milk from the flock,
with fat[c] of lambs,
rams of Bashan and goats,
with the very finest[d] of the wheat—
and you drank foaming wine made from the blood of the grape.
- Deuteronomy 32:8 Or territories
- Deuteronomy 32:8 Compare Dead Sea Scroll, Septuagint; Masoretic Text sons of Israel
- Deuteronomy 32:14 That is, with the best
- Deuteronomy 32:14 Hebrew with the kidney fat
Read the part about Israel’s rebellion and God’s response here.