Bible Rank: 245
And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me. KJV
Be patient. Trust God. God will see you through and you’ll most likely taste this and enjoy His grace in this exceptionally beautiful relationship.
As you serve the Lord and hold on to His promises, keep an eye out for a brother or sister that fits the ANR profile, knowing how and when to bring up the ANR issue should anything develop between you two. No point stressing and obsessing over something that’ll probably happen, if you go about it the right way.
Be patient. Trust God. Don’t be mastered by anything except the absolute supremacy of Christ in all of life.
“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”
— Matthew 6:33
“For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.”
— Psalm 84:11
“He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?”
— Romans 8:32
To those of us who really, really get it, those who instinctively know that an ANR is a godsend, and is very biblical, we’re in even greater danger.
I know this personally. My research and God-given insight into the divine gift of CN sometimes makes me idolize it, and it’s obligatory of me to caution my readers.
Satan doesn’t tempt with the obvious, nor does my flesh rationalize things that are clearly sinful.
A little “harmless” ANR research can head downhill fast.
Being right is inherently dangerous.
Let your fountain be blessed,
and rejoice in the wife of your youth
It’s about loving a person, not a body part or a particular sexual activity.
I’ve been convicted recently of occasionally focusing a little too much on specific body parts, which means I’m setting myself up for disappointment if my future wife doesn’t meet my ideal. In my determination to be faithful to her, I must be open to whoever God brings, as long as she meets most of my preferences.
If you have a specific type of woman, be sure to only date that type. Be 100% sure you want to pursue a woman and that you love her regardless of bra size or body type.
Sandwiched between “let your fountain be blessed” and “let her breasts drench you at all times” is “rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe.” We need to keep things in context. Scripture is always about loving a whole human being.
God is gracious, God is kind. God wants us to have an amazing time in the bedroom after exchanging vows.
I look forward to getting married and having the best time imaginable being refreshed by a pair of natural water fountains. But I sometimes enjoy this prematurely, in thought and “research”.
Wanting an ANR in marriage is not a problem. Fantasizing about it before marriage to the point of lust is what God dislikes and will discipline. Foolishly, I sometimes find myself rationalizing my premature longings with some verses that exhort me to enjoy it only after getting married, much like the famous pastor who said it’s okay to masturbate as long as you’re thinking of your future spouse.
Granted, this situation is pretty tough, as I sometimes have genuine, nonsinful questions and curiosities, but the lack of clean material on Couples Nursing means exposing oneself to potentially compromising sites. Then there are other times when my questions and curiosities aren’t thoroughly critiqued biblically and, left unchecked, lead to online “research” that’s unhealthy and unnecessary. If we’re not very discerning, we won’t realize when we’ve crossed the line from Christ-centered ANR to ANR-centered Christianity.
There’s a particular time of day when loneliness and lust tend to be more pronounced.
From now on it’s exactly then I’ll remind myself of the Son who gave Himself up for me. Love for and close intimacy with Christ prove extremely helpful in battling temptation.
Just thinking back, I’ve gone through months, even years without ANR lust, so I have no excuse.
I resolve to strive to think of CN less graphically and more like Christ would have me. There have been times when all other desires, even CN, look like rubbish next to Jesus Christ and His amazing love for me demonstrated at Calvary. That’s the good news and that’s my eternal hope.
The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction. (Proverbs 1:7 ESV)
There is an old expression. Maybe you’ve heard it. Maybe you haven’t. It isn’t used much anymore. But it needs to be used more. The saying is “putting the cart before the horse.” This little gem of wisdom is all about the the natural order of things.
There is a question that is commonly asked more than any other. When and how do I bring up the subject? Do I join a dating site and create an ad? Do I just start a relationship? Do I marry this person in hopes that he/she may be interested?
There is no set answer. No exact time frames to follow. There are no easy answers in life. There are no magic bullets. Every situation is as unique as the individuals involved. What works for one person may not work for another.
Two common mistakes people make when approaching this subject are as follows.
1.) Seeking the ANR before the actual relationship.
2.) Bringing it up way too early. An example would be during the early dating phase.
The first one is easy to address. And all it really takes is self-control. Don’t mention that you want an ANR. Especially on dating sites. ANR is still shrouded in taboo. If you mention it in your profile you are asking for trouble. Women will pass men over thinking they are freaks. And women will get offers from tons of men only interested in their breasts.
Seek the relationship first. Get to know the person. Learn about them. Start building a bond. If you have a healthy relationship the subject of ANR will probably come up. You must go through the process first. ANR requires a strong partnership to work. This is the time to build that partnership.
The second one is much harder to address. But if you are in tune with each other already you will be able to recognize signs of interest. The best way is too ask questions. Let the relationship progress. Ask questions based on this progress.
Bringing it up on the first, second, or third date is not generally a good idea. Remember, ANR is still considered “taboo” and he/she may look at you weird or start running for the door.
If you are bringing it up at the same time in every relationship, and are still getting rejected. Change your approach. Doing the same thing every time expecting different results is called insanity.
I know you are craving the intimacy that ANR offers. But don’t let that desire overrule your good sense. Constant rejection is hard to deal with. And if your are not careful resentment will set in.
Put your relationship before the ANR. If you put your ANR before your relationship you won’t have one. If you put your relationship before your ANR you will have one. Use wisdom and understanding. And be careful to not “put the cart before the horse.”
Some people find this blog by googling things like “is it sinful to breastfeed my husband?”, and I received this on Wednesday on my Facebook page: “I CANNO’T UNDERSTAND CHRIST CENTERED ANR.HOW CAN LOVE FOR BOOBS AND LOVE FOR CHRIST GO TOGETHER?”
It may seem to many that I am preaching a sexualized form of the have-it-your-way prosperity gospel.
However I’ve come to realize that it’s possible to loathe the prosperity gospel to an unhealthy extent. I should know. That used to be me.
If anyone preaches any other gospel, let them be accursed, warns Galatians 1:8, so I understand the apprehension of many believers when faced with unfamiliar biblical exegeses or potentially compromising/tempting lifestyles.
But those who preach the orthodox gospel tend to ignore biblical allusions to earthly stability.
Of first importance is the glorious gospel of Jesus Christ, but God, being rich in mercy and love, also cares about our earthly needs. Problem is, sinners often misplace our priorities by stressing the mundane over the celestial. At the end of the day, God still wants us to live lives full of joy because the Son rose.
I responded thus to the Facebook message:
“Hi there friend. I really appreciate your honest but interesting question.
You see, this is exactly why there’s a need for Christ-centered ANR. If you read Proverbs 5:19, you’ll observe that Christ unequivocally exhorts me to enjoy my wife’s breasts.
Love for Christ and love for boobs go perfectly well together, as long as all the fun is kept strictly within the marriage covenant.
Please read my post titled ‘Am I twisting Scripture to justify my kinky fetish?’ because I tackle this subject there. Thanks.”
I know many Christians, including some of the church friends mentioned here would think it irreverent for Christians to even contemplate such a thing as an Adult Nursing Relationship. This shows that even Christians aren’t exempt from making God in their own image. But prim and proper doesn’t mean godly and reverent.
Careful study of Song of Solomon reveals that our God does not at all shy away from erotica, and a proper hermeneutic of Song 8:2, 7:8 and Proverbs 5:19 indicates that He sees nothing irreverent about Couples Nursing.
Someone else said this relationship takes the focus off God, while in fact God gets His glory out of every non-sinful thing we do. We need not become overseas missionaries to glorify God.
Pastor JF told me that God gave us the institution of marriage as a means of propagating the gospel by virtue of it being the most natural way to make disciples. I think there are few things more beautiful than believers making more believers, naturally.
Sex is spiritual. When believers have sex, the beauty of the gospel is lived out.
Self-giving sex in the way of the Cross only leads believers to fall more deeply in love with Jesus Christ and better understand the gospel and the Trinity.
Christ’s objective in voluntarily letting His own creatures kill Him isn’t limited to the reconciliation of God and man. It also includes reconciling man to man, or in this case, man to woman. Superior, God-glorifying sex is one of the benefits of having faith in Christ’s atonement.
Blogging about sex, specifically Adult Nursing Relationships, and reaping stronger Christian marriages as a result is the gospel in action.
“Life is good, eternal life is better.” – Stellar Kart
“In the human economy, we have ended up loving things and using people.”
” I am a contributing member on some ANR/ABF groups and discussion panels, and I always tell people that if you desire this intimacy you need to drop the materialistic lifestyle. If you continue to embrace materialism YOU WILL FAIL. There are plenty of work at home opportunities available today which allow you to be nearer each other, and I recommend that the readers here check them out. ”
-Ray Stone’s complaint against our materialistic American culture, as stated in Material Disconnect
“While reading an apologetics book, I learned about intrinsic versus instrumental worth. Human beings have intrinsic worth because we were made in the image and likeness of God. A screwdriver, on the other hand, only has instrumental worth. A lady who uses her breasts to nurture while strengthening her bond with the object of her nurturing realizes her breasts’ intrinsic worth while one who uses them to get attention, increase her self-esteem, or manipulate male co-workers is deceived into viewing her breasts as instruments, as means to an end. Sadly, many ladies have believed the enemy’s lies. Thank God for His Truth that sets them free.”
-me, on A Biblical defense of ANRs
Settle it now. Corporate worship is too important to revisit each weekend and wrestle, “Will I go this weekend, or sit this one out?” Neglecting to meet together will sow and nourish seeds of unbelief in your soul.
If this blog makes you stumble or in any way distracts you from Jesus Christ, stop visiting until you re-focus on the only One that deserves your obsession. Please spend more time reading your Bible than this blog.
The point of my site is Christ, not ANR. Please forgive me if I’ve ever caused you to take your eyes off the Cross. My vision is and has always been to make Christ-centered ANR 100% Christocentric.
Some religions preach Christ AND good works, others add to that Christ AND Mary, some others just preach Joseph Smith.
Christ-centered ANR declares: Christ alone. Only Jesus saves, Couples Nursing doesn’t. An ANR is optional, my mission is only to show Christian couples how beautiful and marriage-enhancing it is.
Of all gifts God has given both regenerate and unregenerate couples, I don’t see anything that’s on par with an ANR in its ability to stabilize a marriage. Still, this ability is null and void compared to the power of the One who condescended into human form and became a curse to satisfy His Father’s wrath, which I rightfully deserve.